Good Morning. I hope you are in fine fettle and that the sun is shining as much as it is here in Somerset. I am sat at my desk writing to you whilst poor old Nancy is sat behind me at another desk doing hard core physics revision. It’s a lonely road for the poor girl as should she come to a point that requires any sort of clarification both Mrs P and I can offer nothing less than the usefulness of the proverbial chocolate teapot! Away from physics I am delighted to report that it has been a couple of days of major milestones here at The Smokery. The first of these is that after seven months I finally found myself sat in a big comfy chair in front of a huge mirror with someone stood behind me bearing a heavy duty pair of shears with which to attack the ridiculous amount of hair that has grown in that time! The results were amazing not only could I immediately bin all hairbands but I also lost nearly a stone in weight and according to Mrs P look about a foot taller. The final relief being that at last my darling sisters, Rebecca and Clara, can stop what they consider to be comedy gold in constantly pointing out that I looked the spitting image of my much loved and missed “Mad Aunt Penny”.
The far bigger milestone and news is that THE ASPARAGUS HARVEST HAS BEGUN and to that end I am utterly delighted to tell you that from today our hugely loved and most popular box of the year THE ASPARAGUS BOX is now available to order and have delivered to whom so ever (other than yourself) deserves such a delicious treat. In case you’ve forgotten it contains: –
2 bundles of fresh Asparagus
1 Hot Smoked Duck breast
100g Smoked Salmon
200g Streaky Bacon
2 x Hot Smoked Trout Fillets
All delivered to any door of your choosing for just £35
I genuinely feel its one of the very best boxes we do and would encourage you, if you love asparagus, to try one. You can order it on the website on www.brownandforrest.co.uk or by calling myself and Amber in the office from 9am tomorrow morning on 01458 250875.
Finally, I wanted to briefly touch on something that I now understand to be something of a lockdown phenomena?! That is the purchasing of a product online that in less mad times you would never in a million years even contemplate let alone part with hard earned cash for and take delivery of. It would appear that I was struck down by this curse and far too much money later I am now the owner of something bright yellow which sole purpose is to do something that I have only ever done once (last month) in 30 years of owning the things and that is of course washing ones car?! Yes, I am now the owner of a power washer. I have no recollection of the thought process that led me to it, and indeed no recollection of actually doing it, but I did. Having now assembled the offending article Mrs P said lots of encouraging things like “well it might be useful to wash the patio with” and “if the drains ever block it will come in very useful”. In the end of course it has already proved to be brilliant for one thing and I now can’t believe I didn’t get one before simply for doing this and that of course is blasting the loons with freezing cold water! It is beyond fun and apart from getting a tiny bit carried away in seeing exactly how powerful the highest setting was and almost blowing Stanley off his feet they love it too!
So I must away as slow roast beef with piles of asparagus is my task for the rest of the day and of course trying to stop the boys seeing what happens to Bob our very old remaining guinea pig if you power wash him!
My very, very best regards,